Friday, February 20, 2009

Facing Challenges- Part Two

Hello again!
In part one, I wrote about challenges and shared a bit of my background to create a relateability factor. In this section, I want to discuss how we get back on the road to success. Of course, what I am sharing is based solely on my experiences and/or opinions and not to be used in place of medical or psychological advice. On that note, let's continue...

When we attempt to solve a difficult math problem, we do not add, subtract and multiply simultaneously. There are rules we must follow and an order of operations to solve the problem efficiently and correctly. Like solving geometric formulas, everything is a process.... therefore, we can never hope to fix ourselves by implementing tons of ideas at once. There must be a concentration focused on one change at a time. After all, we didn't break down in one day... we certainly cannot become whole in one day either.
Acceptance....that there is a problem...that we must begin again...that life is going to throw curve balls...that we can learn to be all right no matter a primary concept we must first allow to breathe from our insides. Kind of like an alcoholic walking into an AA meeting and sharing,"Hi, I'm Ted and I'm an alkie." Only in this case, it's "Hi, I'm me but I don't know who that is nor do I know what to do with the challenges I'm facing." After this admittance, we need to allow it to be okay- just the way it is- with no facades....allow ourselves to be human.
Once we hold the acceptance in our hearts, where do we go? It's one thing to recognize a challenge and quite another to place our feet on the road to overcoming and conquering a problem.
Somehow we must validate our existence. Give ourselves a reason, one we can easily believe ourselves, to validate our life. In simple terms, asking the questions, "Who am I?" and "What is my purpose?" In a world of billions of people, what makes me special? Why was I born? We must actually take the time to delve deep inside and answer these questions. Not off the cuff and flippant, but thoughtfully and completely. After all, we want our lives to be happier, don't we?
Obviously, we are not God. We don't know the exact reason why we are here, but with some time spent in honest reflection, we sure are capable of surmising what we feel is a plausible answer.

Perhaps after sitting in our comfy chairs for an hour and soul searching, we are still stumped. Perhaps the only answer is: "I am here just to be.... period." Or perhaps something profound hits us in our silence: "I am here because I was meant to carry a message of healing to others." Regardless of the meditative result, we have an answer of some sort and we must allow it to be okay also....allow it to add a degree of importance to our every breath...allow it to push us into the mindset of "I really do matter," "I count," "I am here and my existence is as important as anyone else's life." Maybe we even need to practice telling ourselves those statements until they become second nature. Maybe not. Everyone is different. But just what have we accomplished with these questions and answers?
We've validated our importance in this world. We've found the "truth of what is....just as it is." Suddenly, we realize we are not broken anymore... maybe a bit off track, but surely not broken beyond repair...nor is our life and the challenges before us. Our confidence, though up to this point hidden, now begins to awaken.

On that note, I'm ending part two before your heads knock into your monitor and you're out cold. ;o) In part three ( hopefully also the final part of this blog series- but I'm long winded so I can't guarantee that! lol) we will be taking our acceptance, validation, and confidence and begin to tackle new ground towards a better life....perhaps even find some joy along the way.

I wish each of you a night of reflection where you become one with what you see as the reason for your existence. Only when we look within, can we ever find direction.

Hugs, :o)


  1. Powerful. And as a person who has been walking into A.A. meetings for 32 years saying, "Hi, My name is Mark and I'm an alcoholic"...the parallels and the 12-steps work for everything. Particularly your comment about being on this earth for others. The 12th Step of A.A. is "Having had a spiritual awakening as a result of these steps, carried the message to others who still suffer." That's not exact...I'm quoting it from memory which should be better after 32 years of saying it. I think that aging is the next bottom that is going to fall out for me. LOL.

  2. It is very interesting blog.